My name is Patricia Carrillo and I was born and raised in the Coachella Valley. I just finished my last quarter as an undergrad at La Sierra University, in Riverside CA. and I have decided to accept God's calling to be a year-long student missionary in Swaziland, Africa, before graduating in June 2016. The journey leading up to this moment has been an interesting one with many ups and downs, but at the end of the day I think to myself saying, "Wow God. This is it. This is the moment. It is finally here and you have been the one leading me up to this point".
Those closest to me will know that going out as a missionary has been something that God has placed in my heart for many years now, but I always found excuses or reasons as to why I couldn't go. I remember my first quarter at La Sierra University, which was Winter 2011 and the Missions Department was holding their yearly missions week. I was sitting there at the La Sierra University Church pews for University Worship (Now called Chapel) listening to all the great stories about how God has used many students to show love to people across the world and how God had changed them. That same week I went to speak to Linda and Alex in the missions office. Alex wrote my contact information down on a post it and sticked it on the missions desk top computer, right below the screen. I fell in love with missions and ever since that week I would experience many moments in which every year and time that Missions held an event, I felt God telling me, "That will be you some day". Not only that, but it so happened to be that the following school year after giving Alex my information, I would be a part of the leadership team for Collegiate Sabbath School as the Music Director AND it so happened to be that Linda was our advisor/sponsor, so we had our meetings at the missions office every week. Ever since that day that Alex placed my information on the post it note, it had been there the whole time, up until they moved to the Mezzanine Spiritual Life Office.
Every time that we would have our CSS meetings in the missions office, I would look at that post it note and it would be a constant reminder that God has told me that one day it would be my turn as well. Although I had that constant reminder, the days, months and years would pass by and I would keep wrestling with God. I kept wrestling with God, struggling to take that big step and to start the application process because I was afraid. I was afraid of change. I was afraid of leaving my comfort zone. I was afraid of what would be of my life when I came back. I was afraid of leaving the ones I love and so much more. I would tell Linda and others, "No, I can't this year. Maybe next year." I continued to give many reasons and excuses as to why I couldn't go. I was fighting something that from the bottom of my heart I knew that God was calling me to do and something that I've been wanting to do for so long, but was so afraid to TRUST GOD AND GO.
It wasn't until over a year ago in which I slowly started to LET GO AND LET GOD. I was facing many challenges from figuring out what my next step in life would be, to figuring out what my future holds, and figuring out if this is really what God has called me to do. It was at that moment in which I got on my knees and said, "Lord, I give you control. Lead me to where you want me to go". Even in that moment in which I started to slowly let God take control of my life and during the situations that I was facing, I continued to have doubts, but in my weakest moments God gave me strength and kept telling me to move forward and to trust Him. God has also blessed me with so many amazing people that have supported me throughout this journey and have shown me so much love, as well. I feel blessed to have my mom and my brothers who have sacrificed so much for me and are always there for me. As well as my amazing family, friends and so many others who I consider family, that have been there to listen, to cry with me, to laugh with me and so much more.
This past school year has been a crazy one, from it being my last year as an undergrad, to preparing myself to head out to Africa. I have grown so much, spiritually and mentally and God has placed me in many places and situations that I only dreamed of being in. I was blessed to be able to work with our Spiritual Life team as Student Chaplain and it was then, in which God continued to stretch me and help me grow. He continues to affirm my calling to ministry and continually shows me that this is what he wants for my life. God has been SO GOOD and my passion to LOVE and serve others continues to grow, and it's something that I never want it to leave my heart. I want to "Love like I'm not scared". I want to love without expecting anything in return. I want to live a life that shows others that there are people in this world that love them and that above all God loves them! I don't know what God has in store for me in Africa. I don't know what I will face and I don't know exactly how my life will look like when I come back but its ok not to know. Its ok not to know because I am trusting in God that he will guide me and give me the strength to keep moving forward and above all that I may do everything with love.
Thank you for taking the time to read about my journey and visiting my blog site. May you be abundantly blessed....... BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL!